Friday, 9 July 2010

Feeling like an outcast

I do love my beloved Facebook....

But...

Sometimes, I get my fee-fees hurt.

Once in a while, I notice a couple of friends have dropped from my friends list and I try with all my might to figure out who "unfriended" me, but most of the time, I can't figure it out (I am, afterall, Ms Populaire over there and have over 300 friends, so keeping track is hard - LOL!) Anyway, I let those go because I think, if I can't even work out who is missing, I didn't really have a strong connection with them anyway).

But today, something NEW hurt my fee-fees. I had someone on my friends list who I have been friends with for ten years and FB friends with for at least two years. I noticed a little while back that she had removed everything from sight, except for "info" which listed little more than her name. I used to have full access to her profile, including her photos and her wall and now, I had nothing. I figured that she had changed her privacy settings for whatever reason, never thinking that it was just *me* who was exlcuded.

Yesterday, I found out that she is pregnant and I was thrilled for her, so I went to her FB page to offer my congratulations. Once I arrived on her page, I realized that I can't write on her wall, so I sent her a PM, congratulating her and telling her that because I couldn't see anything on her page, I had no idea that she was pregnant. She responded graciously, thanking me for my message and telling me she was very excited about the baby, but not mentioning anything about my extremely limited access to her page.

This morning, I asked two mutual FB friends to see what they could see on her page. They had full access. I then unfriended her. My feeling is that if you can't trust me or feel that I am unworthy of seeing your Facebook page, then you shouldn't have me as a friend in the first place. I have no idea why she feels it necessary to hide her photos or her wall from me, but obviously, she has her reasons...and I have mine, for choosing not to be her friend on Facebook. I am not particularly close with this woman, but we are aquaintances at the very least.

Am I weird for feeling hurt? Can you think of any reason why you would limit access to one mutual friend and not the others? Nothing has happened between us that could cause her to think that I can't be trusted with her information. I am just at a loss here...and I am hurt. Should I be? Pin It

3 comments:

Mollie said...

AMEN SISTER!!!

Karin said...

Maybe she hasn't always been totally honest with you? Maybe there are things on her page that contradict things that you know....

Who knows! I think it's just weird...Like you said, why even add a friend and then totally block everything? May as well just igore the invite or un-friend the person if you'd rather not have them "see" your personal stuff. It kind of defeats the whole Facebook connecting thing...

Life is too short to get hurt by it though. I would have done the same thing you did - unfriend and then move on!

Lisa said...

I think if were me...I THINK I would have to just flat out ask her WTH? I totally would have unfriended her too but I think the whole thing would drive me crazy to not know. Obviously she could continue to ignore the question but to me that's just too odd to not find out about. I could see if it was a friend of a friend or a spouses friend etc etc who really didn't want you seeing their business but felt bad deleting you. But if this person is really a friend (or was) it would make me feel like I'd done something and I'd have to know what!
So to answer your direct question...NOPE not weird at all to have your feelings hurt. But I think I'd eventually go from hurt to annoyed to peeved.

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