Wednesday, 16 June 2010

Breaking Point

This post will be a long one, so if you make it to the end, God bless you.

This is what I typed into my Blackberry Notepad at abut 7:00 tonight:

Today, I reached a new low. A place that I have teetered on the border of before, but have never been, until now. My breaking point has been reached.

This is a bad, bad place. A place I never want to be ever again because I seriously considered walking away this afternoon...I mean seriously.walk.away. Chances are, I would have come back once I cooled down, but I was angry, hurt and disappointed beyond words. The boys knew it too...they had never seen me so upset. The funny thing is that I hardly yelled and I didn't cry...I was just at that point and they knew it.

This week, Clean Sweep 2010, is a week where I am cleaning my house, in an attempt to make it a home again, rather than a house filled with clutter. Considering that I have had Threepeat with me for most of this time, I am extremely proud of my accomplishments thusfar. When I sat down with my family for dinner tonight, my pride was replaced with hurt, when none of my children ate the dinner I worked do hard to make today. It wasn't anything weird or anything...just a simple chicken and rice casserole. Threepeat outright refused to eat any of it, and had two pieces of bread and butter for dinner.

Anyway, once Hubster, MIL and I had finished eating, we headed into the family room, where my anguish continued. Middleman had left his used tissues on the end table, Boy Oneder had left his empty bag of chips on the other table and Threepeat had broken his water gun into pieces and left it all over the floor. I told them all to clean up their messes. Meanwhile, Boy Oneder was running around the house, searching for his lost cellphone. He misplaces his cellphone once a week and, I am sure I have blogged about the fact that his first cellphone was ruined a week after he got it for Christmas, when he left it in his pocket and it went through the washing machine. Needless to say, his lack of responsibility with this phone has driven me nuts. He eventually found the phone, FYI.

Middleman then ran upstairs to use the hair dryer to dry his cleats, which had been sitting in Hubster's car since his sopping wet practice on Saturday. The smell made me physically heave. I told him that from now on, if he didn't empty his bag after every soccer game or practice, he would miss that week's game and practices.

The incessant sound of, "Mommy!" or "Mom!" from the three boys' mouths was driving me nuts. They never yell for their father, always me. The strange feeling I had as I reprimanded the kids scared me. I am SUCH a, Iam certainly not proud of this, but it's the truth...the fact that I wasn't yelling was frightening...honestly frightening. I was calm on the outside, but really freaking out on the inside. I was honestly weirded out because I have never felt this way before...almost in "shutdown" mode. I went back downstairs and Threepeat was coming back in from outside, saying, "Mommy, I was looking for you everywhere!". I asked him why and he said "Nothing" and when I looked over at Hubster, he was reclined on the couch, reading a magazine. Threepeat climbed on my lap. I felt no emotion at all and decided I needed to step away. I went out on the back deck for ten minutes and then came back in to announce that I would take Middleman to his game and Hubster would stay home with Boy Oneder and Threepeat. That was the way it would be. I just couldn't stand to hear "Mommy" one more time. So Middleman and I left.

As I sat in my car, waiting for Middleman's game to start, I drafted a letter and a list of rules that will be presented to the boys when I get home.

I will type them out later, as I am typing right now on my Blackberry.

God give me strength...

It's now 11:01 pm and the kids are in bed. I am still upset at the whole situation, but the kids were good about the letter and the rules, so I have hope that things will change. They have to...plain and simple. The letter basically sets out how upset I was tonight...I don't have the energy to type out the whole thing, but I will share with you the rules...

- sports equipment to be aired out and put away (aired out immediately after practice/game, put back in bag next day)

- misplaced cellphone (and other items), even if found, will be taken away for a week

- beds must be made every morning

- dirty clothes must be put in basket

- clean clothes must be put away neatly (to my satisfaction) on the same day that it is placed in your room

- items left around the house will be thrown away without any warning

- if you don't eat supper, there will be no snack whatsoever at night

- lunch bags are to be emptied every day after school

- school bags are to be placed in the laundry room every night

- bathroom sink is to be kept clean (use wipes after brushing teeth)

- coats are to be hung up and shoes to be put away neatly under coat rack

- headphones to be put away when not in use

- Middleman to wear his glasses every day

- lights/tv off by 10:00 every night

If you donot follow the rules, there will be severe consequences....Middleman will lose soccer and/or PS3 for a week; Boy Oneder will lose hockey and/or cellphone for a week; Threepeat will lose toys and/or sit on the naughty step, as I deem appropriate.

I explained to Boy Oneder and Middleman that Threepeat is only 3 years old and does not understand, the way that they do, how the rules work. He will be punished as I feel necessary, based on his age.

So, time will tell...I plan to be consistent and follow through with my threats. My older boys are old enough to understand what is expected of them and I honestly feel that I am not being unreasonable with my expectations.

Please, dear readers, correct me if I am wrong. Pin It

1 comment:

mapsgirl said...

You are not wrong. My kids at only 5 and 3 are responsible for cleaning their own rooms. The 5 yr old has to empty her bad and lunch bag after school and put it back in the closet. There are many other things that the kids are responsible for as well.

It think that having the kids take care of their own things is only prepping them for the future.

I can't wait until mine are old enough to add "pick up dog poop" to that list.

Stick to your guns!

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