Saturday, 17 April 2010

Littlest one...

At this very time, three years ago, I was anticipating your birth. I lay in a hospital bed in the triage room at Peel Memorial Hospital, suffering not from contractions, but from horrible, angonizing, indescribable heartburn. The contractions were managable, but the heartburn was not.

The excitement of your impending birth and the knowledge that I would hold you in my arms in mere hours, was my strength through that rough time. I laboured through the night, reminding myself that it would all be worth it when I saw you...and oh how it was worth it. As I type this post, I can vividly see the doctor's face as he told me to stop pushing because your umbilical cord was wrapped around your neck. The seconds that it took for him to remove the cord felt like hours...finally, I gave my final push and you screamed to the world that you had arrived. At long last, you were in my arms, more beautiful than I could ever imagine...absolute perfection...and you were mine.

After two other children, you would think that the novelty of holding your child for the first time would wear off a bit, but there is no wearing off for that moment. Nothing in this world compares to holding your child for the first time...knowing that all of the hard times in pregnancy have finally paid off. You were here. You were mine.

I look at you now and see a little boy, no longer a baby...growing too quickly for me to keep up. My tears flow as I recall those special breastfeeding moments, the sleepless nights, your first smiles, giggles, words, teeth, foods, steps....all of those firsts behind you and many more before you...time moves too quickly...much too quickly.

Threepeat, you are our gift. Our special boy who was simply meant to be. I can't imagine life without you...you completed me. You made me whole. You gave our family hope when there was none. You brought joy to a family full of grief and pain. You filled a void that needed to be filled. You are such a special boy in so many ways and I thank God for the honour of being your mother. As you turn three tomorrow, I pray that you receive even half as much joy as you have given to me...you are my world littlest one...Happy Birthday angel. Pin It

1 comment:

Annie said...

You have brought tears to my eyes Dawn, especially with my own little one's birthday coming up tomorrow. Happy Birthday Julian!

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