Monday, 31 July 2006

New job, new start

I have worked for the same GREAT company for 9 1/2 years now. I started working in the Customer Service Department, part time, on January 27th, 1997, after completing a 6 month maternity leave with Boy Oneder. I had previously worked for lawyers and absolutely HATED it. I needed a less-stressful job now that I was a new Mom.

I worked part time for about 3 years and then moved to another Customer Service Department, where I worked for about two years. I then moved up to the Client Training Department. I worked there for 2 years and then I joined the Relationship Sales Centre (”RSC”) in January, 2004. I started out as an Inside Sales Rep with no prior sales experience, except my Mary Kay sales. I quickly learned the ropes with 9 other new reps (the RSC was a brand new department) and in January, 2005, I was promoted to Team Leader for the Eastern Region. I had ten people who reported to me and I loved every minute of it. We grew and grew and just before Joanne died, I was managing 16 people…16 AWESOME people.

After Joanne died, I went on short term disability, to help my brother-in-law get things in order and to spend some time with my Mom, who desperately needed my support, as she was still reeling from my Dad’s death, less than 2 years earlier.

When I returned to work on May 1st, things were VERY different. There were alot of new faces and alot of the old faces had left. My heart just wasn’t in it anymore.

So I applied for the position which I start tomorrow…Conversions Specialist. I will eventually be working from home and I am really looking forward to working directly with clients again.

I will miss my friends in the RSC dearly…some of them are as close to me as family. My boss was wonderful and taught me so very much.

Thank you to all of my RSC pallies….especially those, you know who you are, who have been exceptionally wonderful to me throughout this whole ordeal. I will never forget your kindness. Thanks for the memories, the fun, the laughs, the hugs and the support…I am forever indebted to all of you.

“Keep it real my peeps!” LOL! Pin It

Saturday, 29 July 2006

Volunteering

I have done ALOT of volunteering in my days. I started when I was 12, volunteering at an old folks’ home. I met so many wonderful people, who have left an imprint on my heart that will last forever.

When I was 19, I became a Big Sister. Melinda, my 5 year old “little sister” came from a broken home and needed some one-on-one attention, and I was glad to give it. We remained together for 5 years and then I got married and moved away from Brampton, so we lost touch. I miss her still to this day.

I was a Breastfeeding Companion to new moms, where I was available to answer questions and alleviate those first time mom fears. I loved every minute of it.

I was involved in my boys’ school council for four years, until the gossip and pettiness of the others involved broke my spirit. I now volunteer when I can in their classrooms.

I am so glad that the Ontario Board of Education now makes volunteer work mandatory for high school students to get their diploma. There are far too many people out there who are eager to TAKE, but are waaaay too slow to give.

And so, the PSA of the day is: “Volunteer today…you never know when YOU will be the one who needs someone else to volunteer for you.”

Thank you Mollie for letting me be a part of this wonderful day…I am proud and honoured to have had an opportunity to participate in a wonderful idea. Good luck staying up all night! I’ll try to get on MSN for at least a little while to try to keep you up!HUGS and PRAYERS for a great night! Pin It

Wednesday, 26 July 2006

So Lance Bass is gay and Oprah is not

or was it that Oprah is gay and Lance Bass is not?

I just can’t keep up with all the celebrity goss lately! Each morning, I swear I will NOT look at celebrity gossip today and every day, I give in. It’s like a train wreck…I don’t WANT to look, but

I CAN’T look away!!

I have several of the big celeb goss blogs bookmarked…

Perez-Hilton He was on Howard Stern this morning and he is really quite funny!

Pink is the New Blog I love Trent. He makes me laugh with his little speech and thought bubbles and I LOVE the way he puts “holla bitches” on some of the baby shots…hilarious!

Celebrity Baby Blog This blog is cool. It’s all about celebs and their pregnancies/babies/children. Some really great photos and interesting stories.

Bullet Proof Bracelets Diana really makes me laugh. She has some really funny ways to put things and I always surf away from her blog with a smile on my face.

Purpleolf Blog Humanizing Celebrities I am really disappointed in this blog. Erin just up and left and the blog has not been updated since July 18th. I really liked this blog and I am sad that she just left like that.

So now, you know my dirty little secret…I LOVE celebrity gossip. I can’t help it. That’s just the way it is.

Pin It

Sunday, 23 July 2006

For Joanne



It has been almost six months since my only sibling, my little sister, Joanne, was killed instantly in a snowmobile accident. I’m missing her so much and the guilt of words unsaid, or words that should never have been said, is all-consuming.

I pray each night that she will now know that all those words, both said and unsaid, were out of love…a deep love between sisters that only sisters understand. I find that I am fighting off the tears more now than when she was first killed. She made such an impact on so many people and it is only in her death that I realize how special she was.

Tonight, I wrote this poem for her. Usually, my poems flow abundantly, but this is the first poem that has come to me since her death. I guess I had put up a barrier in my heart. Tonight, this poem flowed…

I wish you could come back to me,
If only for a while.
I wish I could hug you just once
And see your pretty smile.

There was so much just left unsaid,
So much we had to do.
So many dreams left unrealized
I’m left here without you.

The ups and downs were hard to take,
We fought alot it’s true.
But underneath the arguments
Were just different points of view.

I miss your laughter and your jokes.
The way you sang out loud.
I even miss your lectures
Oh my gosh, you made me proud.

I never really told you
How much you meant to me.
I wish with all my heart and soul
That now you truly see.

Every day’s a struggle now,
You’re always on my mind.
I wish that I was with you now
And not here, left behind. Pin It

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ...

Why do we spend half of our lives fighting sleep and the other half craving it?

Since I became a mother, I am more and more enlightened as to why my Mom put us to bed so early…first and foremost, for her sanity; and secondly, for our health.

My boys, ages 10 and 7 spend every evening, between 6:30 and bedtime (usually around 9:00) arguing about why they should stay up later tonight. I have had everything from, “it’s not a school night” to “I am old enough to stay up later.” Boy Oneder, to a certain extent, understands why he needs to have an early night at least once in a while. He suffers with migraine headaches after about a week of late nights. So, on nights like tonight, when I insist that they be in bed by 8:00, he only puts half his effort into fighting it. Middleman on the other hand, comes up with every excuse under the sun: “My tummy hurts, I am thirsty, I can’t sleep, etc. etc.” They are constantly fighting the inevitable.

I remember fighting the good fight with my mom many years ago. I knew that in the end, she would win and I would be in bed, but damned if I would fall asleep! I would PROVE to her that 8:00 was too early. 10:00 would come, and more often than not, I would be WIDE awake, stewing and brewing about what a HORRIBLE mother I had. I am sure my boys do that very same thing.

But now, since becoming a mother, I am fighting my own fight! I WANT sleep. I can’t get enough sleep. Sometimes, I would give ANYTHING for just one more hour of sleep.

And so, the generational sequence continues…kids fight their moms NOT to sleep and moms wish with all their heart that they could GET more sleep.

Only one of many of life’s unfair necessities. Pin It

Friday, 21 July 2006

Things that make you go, "Hmmmmm....."

Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing?

Why isn’t phonetic spelled the way it sounds?

If you can’t drink and drive, why do you need a driver’s license to buy liquor, and why do bars have parking lots?

Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?

How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?

If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?

If nothing ever sticks to TEFLON, how do they make TEFLON stick to the pan?

If you’re in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?

Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?

Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?

Why is it that when you transport something by car, it’s called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it’s called cargo?

Why is it that when you’re driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?

If you have your finger touching the rearview mirror that says — “objects in mirror are closer than they appear,” how can that be possible?

Why is it called a TV “set” when you only get one?

Why does your nose run and your feet smell?

Why is it, whether you sit up or sit down, the result is the same?

Why is it called a “building” when it is already built?

Why do they call them “apartments” when they are all stuck together?

Why is there an expiration date on “sour” cream?

If you keep trying to prove Murphy’s Law, will something keep going wrong?

How can someone “draw a blank?”

Shouldn’t there be a shorter word for “monosyllabic?”

Why is the word “abbreviate” so long?

Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

What is another word for “thesaurus?”

Why do “tug” boats push their barges?

Why do we sing “take me out to the ball game”, when we are already there?

Why are they called “stands” when they’re made for sitting?

Why does “slow down” and “slow up” mean the same thing?

Why is it when two planes almost hit each other it is called a “near miss?” Shouldn’t it be called a “near hit?”

Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?

Why do light switches say on/off? When it’s on you can see it’s on, when it’s off you can’t see to read.

When it rains, why don’t sheep shrink?

If “con” is the opposite of “pro,” is Congress the opposite of progress?

Why do they lock gas station bathrooms, are they afraid someone might clean them?

Why isn’t there mouse-flavored catfood?

Where do forest rangers go to “get away from it all?”

What would Geronimo say if he jumped out of an airplane?

If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?

Could it be that all those trick-or-treaters who wear sheets aren’t going as ghosts, but as mattresses?

Whose cruel idea was it to put an “s” in the word lisp?

If a man is standing in the middle of a forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong?

A split second is the amount of time that elapses after a traffic light turrns green and before the guy in the back of you honks!

Is athiesm a non-prophet organization?

Is there another word for “synonym?”

Isn’t it a bit unraveling that what doctors and lawyers call what they do “practice?”

Is there a Federal agency you’re supposed to call if you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?

If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?

If a turtle loses it’s shell is it homeless or naked?

If police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

How do they get deer to cross the roads at those yellow signs?

Is it true that cannibals don’t eat clowns because they taste funny?

What was the best thing before “sliced” bread? Pin It

Why, indeed?

Funny…five minutes after I posted my questions in the post below, I have to ask WHY the hell I am responsible for what happens in the school yard behind me. Why? Because if *I* don’t deal with it, no one else frickin’ will!!! THAT’S WHY!

Many of you will recall my fight with the City and the School Board at the end of June. If not, you can read about it here and here

Hubster and I have to risk our safety and the safety of our property because no one else really gives a $hit. The “powers that be” are all off, enjoying their summer, knowing FULL WELL that there are security concerns for us. What does the principal tell me before wishing me a good summer?

“Dawn…you’ll make sure to keep an eye out and be proactive when necessary, right?” NO! That’s not MY job A$$HOLE! I told him the reason I fought so hard was because I KNEW there would be kids hanging out back there. He simply shrugged and went on his merry, summer-off way.

Here is a copy of the email I just sent to the principal, the superintendant of schools and our school board trustee:

Hello everyone:

I just wanted to let you know that Hubster and I had to call the police
tonight because there were about 10-12 kids hanging out at the portables. There
were workmen in the school yard today, setting up the stairs and placing plywood
at the bottom of the portables and when I went out at about 10:50 this evening,
I saw the kids and heard splintering wood. I told them to leave the school
property and all but three left. Hubster then came outside and told them he was
calling the police and they eventually left. I don’t know how much damage was
done because, of course, it was dark.

I have filed a complaint with the police, in the hopes that we will get
more patrols in the area, however, I am writing this email with the thought
that:

1. The two broken lightbulbs be replaced at the back of the , which I
advised *V* of prior to the end of the school year and which have still not been
replaced;2. Somehow, someone monitor the school via the cameras in the
schoolyard.

I will continue to call the police if the kids continue to hang out
here, but I am concerned that the police take so long to get to the school and
this would lead to the portables being damaged. I am also concerned for my
family’s safety if I continue to be the one who chases them off.

Do any of you have other ideas on how we can deter the kids from
hanging out and vandalizing the school property?

I hope you are all enjoying your summer and I hope to hear from you
soon.
I know, I was too nice, but the future Ratepayers President in me is SCREAMING, “BE DIPLOMATIC, BE DIPLOMATIC!”
GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!

Pin It

Thursday, 20 July 2006

Typing it all out

This story begins on February 16th, 2000…the day that the black cloud parked itself over my family. This is the day that my Dad was diagnosed with Acute Lymphatic Leukemia. He was 52 years old. The doctors were able to get him into remission fairly quickly, but the treatments really took their toll and Dad was never really the same again.

On January 21st, 2002, Hubster’s Dad died suddenly of cirrhosis of the liver, which we later found out was caused by Hepatitis C, which he probably contracted as a child through doctors reusing needles.

On October 1st, 2002, Hubster’s grandmother died after a three month battle with brain cancer. It was a slow and horrible death, and it was very hard to watch her slowly lose her life.

On March 24th, 2004, we were told that Dad’s leukemia was back for the third time. This time, it had spread to his brain and spinal fluid. There was no hope. He would die this time. He chose to go through some more treatments to prolong his life, but after a short time, realized that all the treatments were doing were making his last few months on earth difficult. He chose to stop all treatments and let nature take its course. His parents and brother and sister-in-law came from England for four days to day good-bye. We all knew he was going and they wanted to say good-bye before he got too sick. They left on April 6th, 2004.

On May 2nd, 2004, my grandfather (my Dad’s dad) died instantly of a massive heart attack. My sister and I flew to England for the funeral.

On May 11th, the day after the funeral, I got a phone call from my Mom that Dad was not doing well. We would have to take the next flight home…he was going to die.

On May 12th, 2004, we arrived home. Dad was in rough shape. It was a hard, hard week.

On May 20th, 2004, my Dad passed away. He was 57.

On January 28th, 2006, my only sister, Joanne, was killed instantly in a snowmobile accident. She was 34 years old. She left behind her husband and her three beautiful daughters, C, 8, R, 7, and D, 3.

The tragedy and sadness that my family has had to endure over the past 6 years has been very difficult to bear. We were getting to the point where numbness took over the pain. Our question was, “Who’s next?” It has been horrible.

On August 9th, 2006, I found out that we are expecting a third child. This is a child that I have always wanted, but never thought I’d get. We had been TALKING about trying for a third, but never really decided to take the plunge. We didn’t have to take the plunge. God blessed us with a child before we even had a chance to properly discuss trying! I like to think that all of the family members that we have lost, especially Joanne, had something to do with this. I can just picture them having a meeting with God, sitting around a boardroom table, giving God reasons why we should have another child! LOL! I wish they could all be here with us to experience the earthly joy, but I know in my heart that they ARE here. They are with me every step of the way.

Thank you God for this wonderful gift. Thank you Daddy, Joanne, Papa, Nanna and Grampy for putting in a good word for us. You have turned the black cloud into a rainbow. You have brought joy back into our lives. Thank you. Pin It

Wednesday, 19 July 2006

Home Hospital

Middleman has swimmers’ ear. I know, I already told you that. But today, I took him back to the doctor because he’s not getting any better and at 2:00 this morning, he woke up hysterical, in excrutiating pain. He also complained that his other ear hurt.

We saw the doctor this morning and she confirmed that his ear drum on the left (the swimmers’ ear side) was bulging and his ear was full of gunk. She also checked his other ear and confirmed that, completely unrelated to water, he had a middle ear infection in the right ear. She says that this one was caused by sniffles and allergies (which, as far I can tell, he doesn’t have, but, whatev…) So, she advised that we continue the ear drops which she gave him on Tuesday and gave us a prescription for oral antibiotics as well. She said we should start seeing some improvement in about 48 hours. 48 HOURS? I don’t think I can last another 24 hours, let alone 48!

So I am home this afternoon, taking care of my baby. It KILLS me to see him in such pain. The motrin/tylenol schedule is barely touching the pain and he’s not eating or drinking because swallowing hurts too much. He’s lying here on the loveseat with his head on my lap, SOUND asleep right now. Sleep is good…he’s not in pain when he’s asleep. He has my beanbag thingy that we warmed up in the microwave on his ear, which probably isn’t helping his raging fever, but it took the edge off the pain, so it will stay there for a bit.

Poor little lamb…I hate when they are sick. Pin It

UGH celebrities

I just HAD to take a moment to post my thoughts on some celebs who have been in the news lately. Some of the stories that I have read drive me MENTAL, especially the Tom Cruise/Katie Holmes baby (or LACK thereof). DISCLAIMER: These are MY thoughts, based on MY tabloid readings. Don’t anyone sue me for libel.

Paris Hilton: She REALLY needs to slow-it-down. If she was a man, I would tell her to keep it in her pants. Man…she is making herself look like SUCH a whore!

Britney Spears: I say the paparazzi should leave her alone when it comes to her parenting skills (or lack thereof). Mothers make mistakes. As for all of her other stupid moves, go to town. But leave her mothering to her.

Suri Cruise: I don’t think that a biological child of Tom Cruise’s exists. I don’t think Katie Holmes was ever pregnant. I have no idea as to motive, other than publicity, bu I am certain that when (and if) we ever see a child that is supposed to be Suri Cruise, it will be an adopted child. Tom and Katie, for whatever twisted reason, faked her pregnancy. No one has seen this child and I will never, ever believe that she is the physical product of Cruise and Holmes.

Pamela Anderson: Good for her…she is marrying Kidd Rock…I knew they’d get together again. I hope this marriage will last for them!

Avril Lavigne: Congratulations! She’s young, but she seems genuinely happy. YAY AVRIL!

Nicole Ritchie: She seems to be gaining some weight…good for her. I hope she has gotten proper help and will stay healthy.

George Bush: Congratulations on your “$hit” slip up….and why not chew with your mouth closed and NOT talk with a mouthful?! Didn’t your Mamma teach you any manners? What a TOOL. P.S. This has NOTHING to do with politics. I don’t follow US politics. This is purely a human being that is a complete IDIOT.

I think that’s it for my celebrity opinions for today…back to your regular scheduled blog… Pin It

Tuesday, 18 July 2006

Boy Oneder strikes again

I am at work. My Mother-in-Law, who lives with us, is out with my Sister-in-Law. Hubster is working from home and is taking care of the boys.

I get a call from Middleman because his ear hurts (the doctor confirmed that he does in fact have an ear infection) and he wants medicine. I tell him to have Boy Oneder bring the Tylenol to Daddy and then I hear Hubster yell in the background, “Get out of here…now…BOTH OF YOU!” Middleman is OK with my suggestion to get the medicine, so we hang up.

Five minutes later, I call home to see what Hubster was so pissed about and Boy Oneder answers.

Here’s how the conversation goes down:

“Hi Boy Oneder.”

“Hi Mom.” I can hear the sadness in his voice.

“What’s wrong?”

”Dad yelled at us.”

“Why?”

”Because I went into your closet and (at this point, my heart is pounding…I KNOW what he is going to say) and I found this thing, like this little green round thing and when you push the button, it vibrates…”

I cut him off…”Boy Oneder, you shouldn’t be in our closet.” I am absolutely panicking because I know what he has found. I’m thinking if I get off the subject of the “green thing”, he will forget about wanting to know what it is.

“Dad said that your closet has personal things in it and I shouldn’t be in there.”

“He’s absolutely right, Boy Oneder. You shouldn’t be going through our things.”

“But I’m older now Mom. I’m not a little kid anymore.” His voice is cracking and he is ready to cry.

“Boy Oneder, it doesn’t matter how old you are, you shouldn’t be going through our things. Why were you in our closet in the first place?” I’m thinking…turn it around on him…make him feel guilty, then he won’t ask questions.

“Because there are some things in there that are cool and they are not personal things and you go through MY things.”

“I don’t go through your things, Boy Oneder.”

“Yes you do Mom.”

”OK Boy Oneder, I am at work. Go and play Gamecube with your brother and stay out of Daddy’s way. Nanna will be home very soon anyway.”

“OK – bye Mom.”

”Bye”

I am STILL mortified. How do you explain such a thing to a 10 year-old child. You just KNOW he’s going to ask when I get home…you just KNOW it. Pin It

Don't F*%K with me today!

Ohhh man…

I woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning. Middleman has an ear infection (Hubster is taking him to the doctor today to confirm it); I have a terrible headache; I was woken up by Middleman at 6:20 am while I was in the middle of the nicest dream; it’s supposed to rain on and off all day; and my mother listed her house last night.

I apologize in advance to anyone whose head I snap off in a fit of rage. I didn’t WANT to hurt you.

DO NOT get in my way today…. Pin It

Monday, 17 July 2006

This one's for the ladies

So, I have come to the conclusion, after much research…ok, no real research, but I have made the assumption that the designer for Always feminine products is a male.

How?

I was opening my microfilm (ok, my freakin’ DIAPER) last night and I noticed that the little piece of paper that holds the trusty “wings” in place prior to use had something written on it. I looked closely and read the following:

“Have a happy period!”

Are you freaking KIDDING me? Have a happy period?!?! WTF is that? I feel like I am bleeding to death, my hormones are making me both physically and mentally loopy and you tell me to have a happy period?! I think he’s ASKING for a kick in the groin!

I knew, right then and there that the maker/designer of these FEMININE products was a man. Only a man would tell a woman to have a freakin’ happy period.

Unbelievable… Pin It

Saturday, 15 July 2006

My latest pet peeve...and it's a DOOZY!




My husband has a new hobby….snoring.

I thought I’d get a little creative with this post and looked up “snoring” on thesaurus.com

Here’s what I found:

Main Entry:
asleep

Part of Speech:
adjective

Definition:
unconscious

Synonyms:
comatose, conked*, crashed*, dead, dormant, dozing, dreaming, flaked out*, hibernating, in dreamland*, in repose, inactive, inert, napping, out*, out cold*, reposing, resting, sacked out*, sawing logs, sleeping, slumbering, snoozing, snoring, somnolent


Roget’s New Millennium™ Thesaurus, First Edition (v 1.2.1)Copyright © 2006 by Lexico Publishing Group, LLC. All rights reserved.* = informal or slang

Amazingly, many of these words are very appropriate…

comatose? yep…that’s himconked? yepcrashed? yepdead? well, not really, but believe me, after two hours of this incessant noise, it’s wishful thinking!


dozing? umm…no…he’s definitely not dozing


dreaming? Only if he is dreaming about earthquakes or freakin’ jet engines!


flaked out? oh yes!


hibernating in dreamland? I guess he kinda does sound like a bearin repose? Nah…too elegant of a word to describe this noise!


inactive? Hell yes! The only thing active about him is his throat!


inert? Had to look that one up…”unable to move or act” LMAO! Yes!


napping? nope…much more than napping, but he DOES snore while napping as well


out? yep


out cold? even more yep!


reposing? nope…much too mild a description


resting? Maybe HE is, but I sure as hell am not!


sacked out? BIG time


sawing logs? Yep…really massive HUGE logs


sleeping? How on God’s green earth he can sleep while breaking the richter scale record is beyond me, but, yes, he is sleeping…and again, I am not!


slumbering? I’m going with no. “Slumbering”, to me, represents peaceful, wonderful sleep. slumbering while causing the house to vibrate is not humanly possible


snoozing? nope…snoozing is a nice little nap. This is not nice, nor little.snoring? Yep…that’s what I’m talking about!


somnolent? I had to look this one up as well…”drowsy, sleepy, inducing or tending to induce sleep…yes, yes, no, NO. I am drowsy, I am sleepy, but he is in NO WAY inducing or tending to induce sleep!

This begs the question…who in the world came up with the idea of sleeping with your spouse once you get married? It is ridiculous. His snoring is getting worse over the years and I am getting less and less sleep. He says I am exaggerating…that it isn’t THAT bad. But it IS that bad. I don’t understand how he doesn’t wake HIMSELF up along with the rest of the neighbourhood!

And so, my loyal blog-readers….do any of you have any true-blue tricks to ending this torture? I can’t kill him, I can’t maim him and I won’t divorce him…so…what can I do to stop it? What worked for you?

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ………………
Pin It

YAY Housework!

There’s NOTHING a girl likes more than to spend a sunny, hot, BEAUTIFUL summer Saturday INDOORS, cleaning the house! While the kids are splashing around in the hot tub (which is set at a temperature of 92 right now, so it’s like a pool), I will be cleaning a toilet. While Hubster is laying in the sun, I will be dusting.

Tomorrow, we are taking Rosie to the groomer and then I have to work in the afternoon, so my weekend is completely and utterly wasted.

Maybe if I start cleaning right now, I’ll be done by 2:00….hmmm………BYE! Pin It

Friday, 14 July 2006

Feeling like an outcast

Have you ever been made to feel like the little girl with glasses or the little boy with freckles and buck teeth?

I’ve felt like that for a while now with a certain group of people I know.

It’s just like being in grade school, when you so desperately want to be a part of the “in crowd”, but for whatever reason, the “in crowd” doesn’t give you the time of day. You go home from school feeling so deflated and sad and no one really gives a rat’s ass…except maybe your Mom. Moms are good that way. They can make you feel like a million bucks, even though the rest of the world couldn’t care whether you are alive or dead.

I still have my Mom, but when I feel so sad and humiliated, I now look to my boys for comfort. They love me unconditionally and I am their world. When the rest of the world sees me as a pain in the ass, they see me as their hero. I am their life and it feels good.

So, the rest of the world can go to hell. I guess I will always be that little girl with glasses, but I am a little girl with glasses who has two little boys who think she is “IT”. They don’t care about anything other than the fact that I am their Mom and I always will be.

Now, 7 years from now, when Boy Oneder is 17 and Middleman is 14, it may be a whole other ballgame, but for now, I’ll take all the loving I can get! Pin It

Wednesday, 12 July 2006

White trash update

I think they are on vacation. I haven’t seen any sign of them or their stupid little rat since the weekend. Maybe they are visiting the inlaws at the trailer park.

I must admit, it is a breath of fresh air to walk on my lawn and not fear a landmine of dog crap…I feel so free!

I still have every intention of “rubbing their nose in it” so to speak. I will wait patiently until they drive back in their old beater of a car. I will get my revenge…I WILL prevail! Pin It

Tuesday, 11 July 2006

Backstabbing and betrayal

Does anyone else out there in cyberland sometimes feel like they are back in high school with all the pettiness and nastiness in the world?

Someone is ALWAYS gossiping about someone else or stepping on someone else to get ahead. It just plain sucks.

I wonder how these backstabbers and betrayers sleep at night. Do they feel bad about hurting others? Are the oblivious to it? Do they not care in the least about it?

My PSA of the day is:

Carry on with your hurtfulness. One day, you will get yours. One day, all the hurt that you have done will bite you in the ass…one day, all the people that you hurt will see the hurt reversed.

Sadly for you, you won’t have friends to help absorb the hurt.

Then, oh sweetly then, it will SUCK TO BE YOU!!!! Pin It

Monday, 10 July 2006

Who let the dogs out? WOOT, WOOT, WOOT, WOOT, WOOT (profanity warning)

OK, not so “woot”…

There’s this White Trash Family across the street from us that own this mangy little rat of a dog. Every night at around midnight, they let this little shit out for a … well, a shit. Problem is, they let him out and then go back in the house. He proceeds across the street (yes, AWAY from his effing house) and he shits on either my lawn or one of my two next-door neighbours’ lawns.



Three times, I have witnessed said shitting firsthand, and all three times, I knocked on the trailer-trashes’ door and advised them that their pooch just pooped on my lawn. They then, under protest of course, pull up their cut off shorts, adjust their wife beaters and stroll over with a bag to pick it up.

There have been many, many other occasions when I have gone out in the morning, only to find a pile of crap on my lawn. Unfortunately, with no proof, other than the fact that their little furball is the only other little dog on the street besides my Rosie, I have felt “unjustified” in doing what needs to be done.



Well my blog-reading friends, the time has come. Tonight, I plan to have a late night stroll and put my evil little plan into action. When little “fluffy”, actually his real name is “Buddy”, comes out for his nightly bowel movement, I will be waiting, stealthily, behind my car. I will be ready to scoop his poop with my shovel, which I will do EVER so carefully. Then my friends, BEFORE they open the door to let the little effer back in, I will skink across the street and strategically place Buddy’s movement on their porch. Depending on my mood, I may even smear it a little on the cement. I will then swiftly sneak back across the street with my trusty shovel, hiding behind my car, waiting patiently for Trailer Trash and his wife to open their door to let their little crapper back into the house. I will do my best to stifle my giggles of pure satisfaction as I watch them reel at the disgust of picking up stinky dog shit. Revenge will be OH so sweet.



I have a dog. When she poops, she poops on MY property, in MY fenced backyard. In the morning, I pick up her waste and put it in MY garbage. If we take Rosie for a walk, I always carry not one, but TWO plastic bags to pick up her poop. I am a responsible dog owner and it’s about time that Trailer Trash and Trailer Trashette learned the responsibility of being a dog owner.

MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Pin It

Meme-ology

Thank you Mr. Fabulous!

MEME-OLOGYGRUB-OLOGY

What is your salad dressing of choice? English Salad Cream
What is your favorite fast food restaurant? Taco Bell
What is your favorite sit down restaurant? Jack Astor’s
On average, what size tip do you leave at a restaurant? 15%
What food could you eat every day for two weeks and not get sick of? Cheese sandwiches with Branston Pickle
Name three foods you detest above all others. Liver, Tomatoes, Olives
What is your favorite dish to order in a Chinese restaurant? I don’t really like Chinese food, but I will tolerate chicken balls
What are your pizza toppings of choice? Cheese and mushrooms
What do you like to put on your toast? Peanut Butter and Jam or Margarine and Bovril
What is your favorite type of gum? Excel – any flavour except cinnamon

TECH-OLOGY

Number of contacts in your cell phone? No idea….maybe 20
Number of contacts in your email address book? About 30
What is your wallpaper on your computer? Work = a photo of Hubster and the boys in the hot tub…home = Huey Lewis
What is your screensaver on your computer? Don’t have screensavers turned on
Are there naked pictures saved on your computer? Nope
How many land line phones do you have in your house? 8
How many televisions are in your house? 6
What kitchen appliance do you use the least? Electric knife
What is the format of the radio station you listen to the most? 80’s baby!
How many sex toys do you own that require batteries? Umm….2

BI-OLOGY

What do you consider to be your best physical attribute? My smile
Are you right handed or left handed? Right handed
Do you like your smile? Yes!
Have you ever had anything removed from your body? Wisdom teeth and splinters
Do you prefer to read when you go to the bathroom? Sometimes
Which of your five senses do you think is keenest? Hmmmm…..taste?
When was the last time you had a cavity? A couple of years ago
What is the heaviest item you lift regularly? Middleman – 50 or so pounds
Have you ever been knocked unconscious? No…thank God

MISC-OLOGY

If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die? No
If you could change your first name, what would you change it to? Jessica…no idea why
How do you express your artistic side? Blogging and scrapping
What color do you think you look best in? Light blue
How long do you think you could last in a medium security prison? 15 seconds
Have you ever swallowed a non-food item by mistake? I don’t think so
If we weren’t bound by society’s conventions, do you have a relative you would make a pass at? When I was little, I had a HUGE crush on my uncle (Dad’s brother) but not now.
How often do you go to church? Rarely {shamefully hides head}
Have you ever saved someone’s life? No
Has someone ever saved yours? No

DARE-OLOGY

For this last section, if you would do it for less or more money, indicate how much

Would you walk naked for a half mile down a public street for $100,000? Yes, as long as I wouldn’t be arrested for it
Would you kiss a member of the same sex for $100? Sure…why not
Would you have sex with a member of the same sex for $10,000? Not for $10,000, but I would for $50,000, if Hubster would let me
Would you allow one of your little fingers to be cut off for $200,000? No…not for any price
Would you never blog again for $50,000? WOW! I don’t think so, but if I could still write in a journal, I would do it for $100,000
Would you pose naked in a magazine for $250,000? Definitely, but I don’t think anyone would buy the magazine!!!
Would you drink an entire bottle of hot sauce for $1000? Nope.
Would you, without fear of punishment, take a human life for $1,000,000? No way
Would you shave your head and get your entire body waxed for $5,000? Not for $5,000, but I would for $50,000
Would you give up watching television for a year for $25,000? Yep – no problem

Tag some people you love, or offer it up to your peeps! Pin It

Sunday, 9 July 2006

The good, the bad, the happy, the sad and the ugly

The Good: ITALY WON THE WORLD CUP!!!! OK, they didn’t REALLY deserve it, France outplayed them in the 2nd half and both overtimes, but they WON and at this point, that’s all that matters!

The Bad: I think Middleman has an ear infection. He has been complaining for two days of earache. If he still has it tomorrow, we will take him to the doctor.

The Happy: We spent the afternoon at our best friends, Kathy and Bruno’s house. They have a new pool and the kids spent the entire day swimming. We watched the game together and had a great time. After the game, we took the kids to the centre of town, Market Lane and partied with about 20,000 other fans. It was BEDLAM. I can’t even imagine what St. Clair in Toronto, which is Little Italy, looked like tonight…pure chaos!!! We painted the kids’ faces green, white and red and we took little Italian Flag coloured Rosie to celebrate with us. So many people took photos of her, saying, “She’s SOOOOOO cute!!”

The Sad: At about 8:00 tonight, Gemma’s flight took off to take her home. I dropped her off at the airport at 5:30 and struggled not to cry in front of her. As I drove away, I cried so hard, I could barely see the road to drive. We had such a nice time together and I really enjoyed her company. I miss her already. When I tucked the boys in tonight, Boy Oneder said, “Mom…I miss Gemma.” I said, “Me too.” He then asked me when she could come back again. I told her I hoped she’d be back again next year. Start saving those pennies Gemma…we want you back and SOON! **As I was typing the next part of this post, Boy Oneder came downstairs crying. “I miss Gemma so bad Mom.” I hugged him and told him that her mom must really miss Gemma and want her to come back home and I told him how much I would miss him if he had gone on vacation. I told him that tomorrow, he and Middleman should write a letter and draw a picture to send to Gemma so that she can put it in her bedroom until she comes again. Bless his heart. He REALLY took to her. (

The Ugly: Back to work tomorrow morning. 7:00 is going to come VERY early tomorrow and I am going to miss the time I spent with the boys. I’ve had such a nice vacation, but, as usual, it went much too quickly. I plan on taking the first week of August off, so that is something to look forward to. I need to win the lottery or get myself a sugar daddy or something. I like staying home too much. ( Pin It

Friday, 7 July 2006

Well, male strippers are not what they used to be!

I am not a prude by ANY stretch of the imagination, but the things I saw last night were just…well…disgusting.

Back in the day, the strip joint I frequented, Tropicana in downtown Toronto, was a clean, small little place with some pretty classy peelers (I know, I know, oxymoron). They would strip to their g-strings and the girls would laugh and carry on and have a grand old time. If you were lucky, the stripper would see you frantically waving a two dollar bill over your friend’s head and they would take her up on stage to embarrass her a little bit. By “a little bit”, I mean putting the money in her shirt and fetching it innocently with his mouth, or lying her down and “going through the motions”.

Well…

Last night was a totally different story. They stripped down to nothing and only held a small white towel over their “naughty bits”. If a woman was taken up on stage, she was molested, humiliated and completely disgraced! The things they were doing to these women were, to say the least, vile. The worst part was that there was a woman there by herself, about my age, and she was paying her OWN way up on stage! Over and over again, she would take out her five dollar bill and go up on stage, anxiously awaiting her turn. She was SO into the whole thing, we were all ready to vomit! The men were all pretty disgusting, save for two who did their show together…they were pretty hot, but imagine the “damage” two of them can do to one woman…oh it was bad.

We laughed our asses off all night and then decided at about 12:45 that we wanted to go to Denny’s for some breakfast. At 1:00 in the morning, I was porking out on eggs, bacon, sausages, hash browns, toast and tea. I felt like a teenager again.

This morning was a whole other story. I felt like DEATH. I have been groggy all day and I am suffering for my partying ways. Didn’t I just post last weekend that I can’t handle the partying and drinking any more? Never again, never again…hmmm….same old story huh? Pin It

Thursday, 6 July 2006

Oh dear...







What have I DONE?

A few of my neighbours decided that it would be a good idea to take Gemma, my Godmother’s daughter, who is visiting from England, to a male strip club tonight.

I haven’t been to a ripper bar (a male one anyway) for about 17 years!!! I was excited about it until about half an hour ago, when I realized that I’m going to be watching men strip down to NOTHING! I’m going to be staring at pee-pees all night!

Oh dear….God forgive me…. Pin It

Tuesday, 4 July 2006

New family members

Today, Hubster needed a new piece for his pond cleaner…ok, it’s not really a pond, it’s more like a puddle, but it is HIS puddle.

We get to Big Al’s Aquarium Centre and the boys start checking out the fish. Me, being the wonderful mother that I am, decide to get them a betta each. They were $3.99 each, including the bowl. Then I see the little guppies. They are SO cute. So, I grab an aquarium, a plastic one, with all the fixings…water conditioner, food, a plant and gravel and the filter. $39.99. We then grab two female guppies and a male (we want babies). And then, because the aquarium is 7 gallons, I decide to get two little aquatic frogs to boot.

$92.00 later, we are the proud owners of five new aquatic dudes. The kids are in their element and can’t stop looking at their new pets. Unfortunately, they have a desire to FEED the little buggers over and over again, so to save them from eating to death, I have had to hide the food.

I must admit, they are cute. We are working on names and I will update once the naming is complete.

On another pet note, Rosie, our five year old Bichon Frise is now painted like the Italian flag. Her *um is red, her middle is her natural colour, white, and her head is green. Italy won today and I promised the boys we would paint her if they won. We used food colouring, so please don’t go calling the SPCA on us. Of course, five minutes after we did it, I called her groomer, asking for an URGENT appointment to get her shaved down and we will “fix” her on Monday night…conveniently AFTER the World Cup finals. I have a photo, but can’t upload it until next week. She does look adorable.

FORZA ITALIA!!! Pin It

Happy 4th of July!!

To my American neighbours! Although I am Canadian, I am proud to be your neighbours/your family.

Have a great day everyone! Pin It

Monday, 3 July 2006

Blog addiction

I am officially addicted…to my Blog.

Every spare SECOND I get, I am logging onto the computer to check my blog stats and to play a little over at Blog Explosion.

It’s crazy…just crazy.

Is there a “BA” like “AA”? I might need it. Pin It

Sunday, 2 July 2006

I'm officially getting old

Hubster, Gemma and I went to the neighbours’ house last night for a wine and cheese party. There were five couples, including us. We are the oldest couple, Hubster being 39 and me being 36. I think the next couple is 36 and 34.

It occurred to me that I can’t drink and smoke the way I used to on a Saturday night. Back in the day, a Saturday night BEGAN at 9:30-10:00 and ended waaaay into Sunday morning. A pack of smokes would be gone in that time and don’t even TALK to me about drinks…too many to count. I would stagger into bed, anywhere between 2:00 and 5:00 am and sleep until at LEAST noon. No kids to wake me up, no responsibilites, just blissful sleep.

Back to last night…I had a few glasses of wine throughout the day yesterday, sitting in the backyard, so by the time we went to the neighbours’ house (at about 7:00), I was way ahead on the drinking front. I only had two more glasses last night and we smoked pretty much every hour.

By 11:45, I was absolutely exhausted. Everyone else was doing shooters and having a blast. I just couldn’t do it.

So, we walked home and I fell into bed at midnight. This morning, at 8:07 am, Middleman wakes me up by waving the England flag that grandma gave him in my face. LOVE that kid! LOL!

And so, it has finally occurred to me that I am getting old. I have passed that threshold in life of being able to handle late nights of drinking and smoking. My next threshold is grandmahood. Oh dear God let’s not go there yet! Pin It

Saturday, 1 July 2006

62 question meme

I “borrowed” … alright, I STOLE this meme from Pointless Drivel Stop by their blog…it’s pretty cool.

Sixty-Two Question Meme

1. How old do you wish you were? 23
2. Where were you when 9/11 happened? In my family room, on maternity leave. We had just come home from Las Vegas at 2:00 that morning. It was one of the scariest days of my life.
3. What do you do when vending machines steal your money? Get REALLY pissed and try to find someone to help me get it back.
4. Do you consider yourself kind? Yes…definitely.
5. If you had to get a tattoo, where and what would it be? I already have two…one on the small of my back (a butterfly on ivy) and one on my shoulder (a Union Jack with the leukemia awareness ribbon through it with “Dad” and his date of birth and date of death). I defintely want more…probably on my hip.
6. If you could be fluent in any other language what would it be? Italian.
7. Do you know your neighbors? VERY well. Tonight, we have a wine and cheese party with the six couples we always hang with. We have gone away together and do everything as a group.
8. What do you consider a vacation? A beach, free-flowing booze and NO KIDS.
9. Do you follow your horoscope? Sometimes….just for fun.
10. Would you move for the person you loved? 100% yes.
11. Are you touchy feely? Not really.
12. Do you believe that opposites attract? Yes and no. I think that opposites can attract initially, but I don’t think it’s conducive to a long term relationship…not complete opposites anyway.
13. Dream job? Movie actress.
14. Favorite channels? HBO and TLC.
15. Favorite place to go on a weekend? Golfing.
16. Showers or Bath? Always a shower.
17. Do you paint your nails? Sometimes.
18. Do you trust people easily? Yes…unfortunately, much too easily. I’ve been burnt several times.
19. What are your phobias? Bees and wasps.
20. Do you want kids? Got ‘em thanks.
21. Do you keep a handwritten journal? Yes…several. Started, but never finished.
22. Where would you rather be right now? On a beach, with free-flowing booze and NO KIDS.
23. What makes you feel warm and safe? Snuggling with Hubster and the boys.
24. Heavy or light sleep? Light, usually…welcome to motherhood.
25. Are you paranoid? Most of the time, yes.
26. Are you impatient? Hell, yes!
27. Who can you relate to? A lot of people, really.
28. How do you feel about interracial couples? Love is love. It does not know colour, sex or religion. Live and let live, I say.
29. Have you been burned by love? Oh yes.
30. What’s your life motto? Treat others as you would like to be treated.
31. What’s your main ringtone on your mobile? A boring, straight ring.
32. What were you doing at midnight last night? Sleeping.
33. Who was your last text message from? Canada 411.
34. Whose bed did you sleep in last night? Mine.
35. What color shirt are you wearing? White tee-shirt.
36. Most recent movie you watched? Over the Hedge.
37. Name five things you have on you at all times? My keys, my cell phone, my cigarettes, my lighter, my money.
38. What color are your bed sheets? green and beige stripes.
39. How much cash do you have on you right now? Nothing “on me”. I have about $20.00 in my purse in the car.
40. What is your favorite part of chicken? Breast.
41. What’s your favorite town/city? Bristol, England.
42. I can’t wait till…tonight…the wine and cheese party.
43. Who got you to join MySpace? I don’t belong to MySpace.
44. What did you have for dinner last night? {blush} Chef Boy-ar-dee Beef Ravioli and toast.
45. How tall are you barefoot? 5’4”.
46. Have you ever smoked crack? No way.
47. Do you own a gun? Nope, unless water guns count…we have a crapload of those!
48. What do you prefer to drink in the morning? Tim Horton’s large coffee, one cream, two sugar.
49. What is your secret weapon to lure in the opposite sex? My cleavage.
50. Do you have A.D.D.? Nope.
51. What time did you wake up today? 8:48 a.m.
52. Current worry? Not enough memory at blogspot to list.
53. Current hate? Portugal…but hopefully, only for the next hour or so…England is playing them right now.
54. Favorite place to be? At the beach.
55. Where would you like to travel? England (again…been there probably 20 times), a cruise (again…been on them 4 times)
56. Where do you think you’ll be in 10 yrs? Here…lol.
57. Last thing you ate? A Trebor Extra Strong Mint…thanks Gemma!
58. What songs do you sing in the shower? Anything 80’s!
59. Last person that made you laugh? Gemma…she’s VERY nervous during this England game!
60. Worst injury you’ve ever had? I fell off my bike when I was about twelve on a gravel road. Taking out all the little pieces was excrutiating.
61. Does someone have a crush on you? Do my kids count? If so, yes. {swoon}
62. What is your favorite candy? Anything from England. I now have a great stash thanks to Gemma!!! Hmmm…gonna go have a Turkish Delight right NOW! Pin It
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